Insurance Claim Denied After Policy Excludes Acts of Lich
Fine print in standard adventuring policy reveals comprehensive list of excluded supernatural perils.

A veteran adventurer's claim for 45,000 gold pieces has been denied by Realm Mutual Insurance after adjusters determined that the total destruction of her equipment fell under the policy's Acts of Lich exclusion clause.
Barbarian Kestra Stonefist filed the claim after her enchanted greataxe, three sets of armor, and a bag of holding were vaporized during an encounter with Archlich Netherius. Her standard adventuring policy explicitly excludes damage caused by liches, demi-liches, proto-liches, or any undead spellcaster of Challenge Rating 15 or above.
"I've been paying premiums for eleven years," Stonefist told reporters. "Apparently they cover goblin attacks and pit traps, but the moment an undead archmage disintegrates your entire inventory, suddenly it's an excluded peril."
A Realm Mutual spokesperson defended the policy, noting that lich encounters are inherently uninsurable events and that comprehensive coverage would require premiums roughly equivalent to the GDP of a small kingdom.
AI-generated satirical fiction. Not real news.
Comments
Loading comments...