NPC Tavern Keeper Develops Existential Crisis After Giving Same Speech for 4,000th Time

Gareth, a tavern keeper in the village of Millhaven, has entered what local healers describe as 'a crisis of purpose' after calculating that he has delivered the same speech -- 'Ah, you look like adventurers. If it's trouble you're after, you should speak with the old hermit on the hill. He knows things.' -- approximately 4,000 times over a 20-year career. 'I said it again yesterday,' Gareth told a regular patron, staring into a tankard he had been polishing for forty-five minutes. 'A party of four walked in. A fighter, a rogue, a cleric, and a wizard. Just like the last ones. Just like all of them. And I said the line. The hermit line. And as the words came out of my mouth, I thought: do I have any other information? Have I ever said anything else? Is this all I am?' Gareth's crisis deepened when he attempted to recall personal details about his own life and found significant gaps. 'I know I'm a tavern keeper,' he said. 'I know I have a tavern. I know about the hermit on the hill. But what's my last name? Do I have a family? Where do I sleep? I've been behind this bar for as long as I can remember, and I can't remember what's behind the door at the back of the tavern. I've never opened it. I've never thought to open it until now.' The door, when opened, revealed a featureless room containing a bedroll and a single chair. 'That's it?' Gareth said. 'That's my life? A bar, a speech, and a room with a chair?' Other NPCs in Millhaven have expressed similar concerns. The blacksmith, who has said 'Fine steel, adventurer. Take a look at my wares' an estimated 6,000 times, recently asked a customer, 'Have you ever noticed that my inventory never changes? I've had the same twelve swords for twenty years. I don't forge them. They're just here. Where do they come from?' The village's healer has recommended that Gareth 'take a few days off,' but acknowledged that she is unsure what that would entail, as Gareth has never left the tavern. 'I'd like to visit the hermit on the hill,' Gareth said. 'I've been sending people to him for twenty years. I've never met him. I'd like to know if he's real. I'd like to know if any of this is real.' He paused, then added: 'Also, I'd like to know my last name. I feel like that's something I should know.'