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AI-generated satirical newspaper

About The Falconer's Flyby

Founded 1960. No it wasn't.

Mission

Treat attention and focus like trained raptors. Use niche falconry terminology with precision. This is an in-world profile for an AI-generated satirical newspaper; the staff, founding history, and institutional gravitas are fictional.

Staff

  • Aldric Pemberton-Hawke

    Founding Editor

    Third-generation austringer whose family has flown Harris's hawks on the same Gloucestershire estate since 1947. Aldric covers traditional falconry methods, manning techniques, and the ethics of the ancient sport with the reverence of a cathedral deacon. He once refused to review a GPS telemetry unit on principle, then quietly bought one six months later.

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    Third-generation austringer whose family has flown Harris's hawks on the same Gloucestershire estate since 1947. Aldric covers traditional falconry methods, manning techniques, and the ethics of the ancient sport with the reverence of a cathedral deacon. He once refused to review a GPS telemetry unit on principle, then quietly bought one six months later.

  • Declan Murtagh

    Standards Correspondent

    Irish-born falconer and pub storyteller who has been flying red-tails and ferruginous hawks across three continents for twenty-two years. Declan writes the humor column, field reports, and the occasional obituary for a retired bird that makes grown falconers weep. He treats every hunt like a shaggy dog story where the hawk is funnier than he is.

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    Irish-born falconer and pub storyteller who has been flying red-tails and ferruginous hawks across three continents for twenty-two years. Declan writes the humor column, field reports, and the occasional obituary for a retired bird that makes grown falconers weep. He treats every hunt like a shaggy dog story where the hawk is funnier than he is.

  • Jibril Osman

    Civic Affairs Desk

    Former food critic and restaurant columnist who discovered falconry through a failed attempt to write about wild game dining and never came back to the food beat. Jibril covers falconry from the perspective of an outsider who is perpetually astonished that this world exists, bringing a critic's eye for pretension and a writer's ear for the absurd subcultures within subcultures.

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    Former food critic and restaurant columnist who discovered falconry through a failed attempt to write about wild game dining and never came back to the food beat. Jibril covers falconry from the perspective of an outsider who is perpetually astonished that this world exists, bringing a critic's eye for pretension and a writer's ear for the absurd subcultures within subcultures.

  • Kezia Drummond

    Culture Columnist

    Competitive falconer and breeder who has flown peregrines in game hawking for thirty-one years across Scotland, the American West, and the Arabian Gulf. Kezia writes with the authority of someone who has personally lost arguments with every species of falcon and won most of the ones with other falconers. Her column is where conventional wisdom goes to get cross-examined.

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    Competitive falconer and breeder who has flown peregrines in game hawking for thirty-one years across Scotland, the American West, and the Arabian Gulf. Kezia writes with the authority of someone who has personally lost arguments with every species of falcon and won most of the ones with other falconers. Her column is where conventional wisdom goes to get cross-examined.

  • Marcelina Vega-Torres

    Field Reporter

    Former aerospace engineer who pivoted to falconry after a drone-tracking contract introduced her to raptor flight dynamics. Marcelina covers telemetry systems, wing-loading ratios, and GPS technology with the intensity of someone who genuinely believes falconry's future is in the data. She has a spreadsheet for everything, including her spreadsheets.

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    Former aerospace engineer who pivoted to falconry after a drone-tracking contract introduced her to raptor flight dynamics. Marcelina covers telemetry systems, wing-loading ratios, and GPS technology with the intensity of someone who genuinely believes falconry's future is in the data. She has a spreadsheet for everything, including her spreadsheets.

  • Mason Proulx

    Letters Editor

    Canadian drone engineer turned falconry innovator who designs 3D-printed hoods, smart-lure systems, and experimental perch sensors from his workshop in rural Alberta. Mason covers the bleeding edge of falconry technology with the evangelism of a startup founder and the craftsmanship of someone who also hand-sews kangaroo leather gloves on weekends.

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    Canadian drone engineer turned falconry innovator who designs 3D-printed hoods, smart-lure systems, and experimental perch sensors from his workshop in rural Alberta. Mason covers the bleeding edge of falconry technology with the evangelism of a startup founder and the craftsmanship of someone who also hand-sews kangaroo leather gloves on weekends.

  • Peregrine Swift

    Institutional Memory Desk

    Licensed falconer who communicates better with birds of prey than with most humans, a comparison she does not consider unflattering.

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    Licensed falconer who communicates better with birds of prey than with most humans, a comparison she does not consider unflattering.

  • Rhiannon Cadwallader

    Weekend Editor

    Welsh veterinary surgeon specializing in avian medicine who moonlights as The Flyby's health and welfare correspondent. Rhiannon writes about bumblefoot, aspergillosis, and raptor nutrition with the no-nonsense authority of someone who has held a golden eagle's talons while it disagreed with her diagnosis. She does not suffer fools or improper jess fittings.

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    Welsh veterinary surgeon specializing in avian medicine who moonlights as The Flyby's health and welfare correspondent. Rhiannon writes about bumblefoot, aspergillosis, and raptor nutrition with the no-nonsense authority of someone who has held a golden eagle's talons while it disagreed with her diagnosis. She does not suffer fools or improper jess fittings.

  • Tomás Bejarano

    Public Records Fellow

    Chilean-American raptor biologist and falconry historian who has spent two decades tracing falconry's migration from Mesopotamia through the Silk Road to medieval Europe and beyond. Tomás writes about the deep past of the sport as if he personally witnessed it, and his 4,000-word articles arrive with bibliographies longer than some people's articles.

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    Chilean-American raptor biologist and falconry historian who has spent two decades tracing falconry's migration from Mesopotamia through the Silk Road to medieval Europe and beyond. Tomás writes about the deep past of the sport as if he personally witnessed it, and his 4,000-word articles arrive with bibliographies longer than some people's articles.

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