Ultralight Hiker Replaces Tent With Positive Thinking

Appalachian Trail thru-hiker Derek 'Vapor' Sandstrom announced this week that he has achieved a new personal record base weight of 4.7 pounds by replacing his tent with what he describes as 'aggressive optimism and a thorough understanding of meteorological denial.' 'Shelter is a crutch,' Sandstrom said from a trailhead in Virginia, standing next to a backpack roughly the size of a lunchbox. 'If you truly believe in fair weather, fair weather will come. I read that on a gear forum.' Sandstrom's gear list, which he has published on three separate ultralight forums and tattooed on his forearm, includes a sleeping quilt cut in half ('I only sleep on one side anyway'), a titanium spork with the handle filed down to save 0.3 grams, and a water filter made from 'a sock and confidence.' Fellow thru-hikers have expressed concern. 'He cowboy camped through a thunderstorm in the Smokies,' said trail companion Rachel 'Gravity' Chen. 'He just lay there in the rain whispering his base weight like a prayer.' Sandstrom's approach has gained a small following on ultralight forums, where users compete to achieve the lowest possible base weight. One acolyte reportedly trimmed additional weight by removing all clothing labels and sanding down his boot eyelets. Trail angel Martha Wilkins, who has provided aid to hikers for fifteen years, said Sandstrom arrived at her trailhead station 'shivering, soaking wet, and absolutely radiating smugness about his pack weight.' Sandstrom plans to further reduce his load by 'eliminating the concept of a backpack entirely' on his next thru-hike, carrying all gear in his pockets.