New Fish Species Discovered, Immediately Embroiled in Naming Controversy

Marine biologist Dr. Philip Reef has thrown the International Commission on Zoological Nomenclature into turmoil by insisting that a newly discovered deep-sea fish be named Pseudochromis mittensiae, after his tabby cat Mittens. 'Mittens has been a constant source of inspiration throughout my research,' Dr. Reef said, holding up a photograph of the cat next to a photograph of the fish, which bore no resemblance to each other. 'They share the same curious spirit. Also, Mittens watches me work every day, which is more than I can say for my co-authors.' The nomenclature committee rejected the proposed name in a formal ruling that described it as 'taxonomically frivolous and an insult to the Linnaean tradition.' Committee chair Dr. Astrid Pelagius noted that species names should reflect 'morphological characteristics, geographic origin, or distinguished scientists -- not domestic pets.' 'We've allowed species to be named after celebrities, fictional characters, and at least three different Muppets,' countered Dr. Reef. 'But a cat who has contributed meaningfully to marine biology by sitting on my keyboard during manuscript preparation? Apparently that's too far.' The commission has proposed the alternative name Pseudochromis abyssicola, meaning 'deep-dwelling,' which Dr. Reef has called 'boring, unimaginative, and an insult to Mittens, who is neither boring nor unimaginative.' A compromise has been suggested by a junior committee member: naming the fish Pseudochromis felinospiritus, or 'cat spirit,' which both sides have rejected for different reasons. Mittens, for her part, has shown no interest in the controversy, having recently pushed a glass of water off Dr. Reef's desk and fallen asleep on his latest research paper.