Man Who Learned to Juggle From YouTube Tutorial Now Unbearable at Every Social Gathering

Area resident Kevin Flashpoint, 34, has become what friends and family describe as 'completely insufferable' since learning a basic three-ball cascade from a twelve-minute YouTube tutorial approximately six months ago. 'He carries beanbags everywhere,' said longtime friend Danielle Torres. 'Everywhere. He juggled at my grandmother's funeral. He said it was a tribute. My grandmother didn't know what juggling was.' Flashpoint, a software developer, reportedly discovered juggling during a lunch break and has since reorganized his entire personality around the hobby. His social media accounts now feature daily practice videos, his email signature includes the phrase 'Toss. Catch. Repeat.', and he has legally changed his middle name to 'Cascade,' a process he described as 'surprisingly straightforward.' 'The worst part is he's not even good,' said coworker Brian Steadystate. 'He drops constantly. But he's read enough Reddit threads to narrate what he's doing wrong in technical language. So you're watching someone fail while they explain that their "scoop throw is initiating too far from the midline, causing lateral drift in the apex." It's exhausting.' Flashpoint has also begun correcting strangers. Torres recalled an incident at a county fair where Flashpoint approached a professional circus performer to suggest that 'your dwell time could be tighter on those backcrosses,' a comment that resulted in what Torres described as 'the most withering silence I have ever witnessed.' Flashpoint remains undeterred. He has registered for his first juggling competition and is designing business cards that read 'Kevin Cascade Flashpoint — Juggler, Philosopher, Seeker of Flow.'