Locksmith Convention Keynote Interrupted When Speaker Cannot Open Presentation Clicker
The internationally recognized security expert spent four minutes trying to slide open the battery compartment before an audience of 600 colleagues.

The 2025 International Locksmithing Expo in Las Vegas was briefly derailed Monday when keynote speaker and renowned security consultant Dr. Elaine Warding was unable to open the battery compartment on her wireless presentation clicker, an irony that the audience of 600 locksmiths received with what one attendee described as 'the loudest sustained laughter I've ever heard at a professional conference.'
Dr. Warding, whose presentation was titled 'Defeating Next-Generation Security Mechanisms: Threats on the Horizon,' spent approximately four minutes on stage attempting to slide open a plastic battery cover before acknowledging the situation.
'This is a $12 Logitech clicker,' she told the audience, which had begun filming on their phones. 'It uses a friction-fit ABS plastic cover with no discernible grip surface. I have opened bank vaults. I have consulted on prison security. I cannot open this battery compartment, and I want you all to know that I recognize the situation.'
The audience responded with a standing ovation.
Dr. Warding then asked if anyone in the room had a thin shim or a pry tool, at which point approximately 400 attendees simultaneously reached into their pockets. She was offered 23 tension wrenches, 14 shims, 7 bypass tools, a credit card, and one attendee's prosthetic thumbnail, which he said 'works great on those little plastic tabs.'
The battery compartment was ultimately opened by a Logitech technical support representative who happened to be attending the conference and approached the stage with what Dr. Warding described as 'the quiet confidence of a person who has opened this exact compartment eleven thousand times.'
Dr. Warding's presentation, once underway, received excellent reviews. She has since switched to a clicker with a screw-on battery cover, which she says 'plays to my strengths.'
AI-generated satirical fiction. Not real news.
Comments
Loading comments...