Guest Conductor's Baton Flies Into Third Row, Audience Member Returns It With Unsolicited Tempo Feedback

A guest conductor's baton escaped his grip during a particularly vigorous accelerando in the first movement of Tchaikovsky's Fourth Symphony Saturday evening, sailed over the heads of the first violins, and landed in the lap of a third-row patron who returned it with handwritten tempo suggestions. The conductor, Maestro Dmitri Sforzando, was leading the Metropolitan Philharmonic in what the program notes described as 'a reading of volcanic intensity' when the carbon fiber baton — a Mollard P Series, retail $85 — departed his right hand at approximately measure 194. 'The sforzando passage requires a very committed downbeat,' Maestro Sforzando explained backstage, visibly embarrassed. 'I was committed. The baton was not.' The projectile traced a parabolic arc over the concertmaster's stand, clipped a music stand light, and came to rest in the lap of retired music teacher Edith Fortepiano, 73, who examined it briefly before producing a mechanical pencil from her purse and writing on her program. When an usher arrived to retrieve the baton during the pause between movements, Mrs. Fortepiano handed it back with the program, on which she had written: 'Lovely tone. Development section rushed by approx. 8 BPM. Also your grip is too loose — try the Hideo Saito method.' Maestro Sforzando, upon receiving the feedback, was reportedly silent for several seconds before saying, 'She's not wrong about the development section.' The remaining three movements proceeded without incident, though multiple audience members noted that the Maestro's grip appeared 'noticeably tighter' and the development section of the finale was 'conspicuously measured.' Mrs. Fortepiano rated the performance 'seven out of ten' in her post-concert survey and requested a complimentary dry-cleaning voucher for a 'baton-related skirt mark.' The request was granted.