Rookie Quarterback's Arm Strength Measured at 'One Whole Weather System'

First overall pick Cannon Armstrong's arm strength has been officially reclassified by the NFL Scouting Combine from 'elite' to 'meteorological' after his 40-yard throw at February's combine created a localized atmospheric disturbance that the National Weather Service briefly tracked as Tropical Depression Cannon. 'The ball left his hand at approximately 72 miles per hour,' said combine director Tom Velocity, reviewing high-speed footage. 'But the air displacement created a low-pressure zone that developed rotational characteristics. We had to evacuate the 50-yard-line seats.' Armstrong, a 6'5", 237-pound product of the University of Oklahoma, has displayed arm strength that scouts describe using terms typically reserved for natural disasters. His pro-day workout included a throw that traveled 81 yards in the air and embedded itself three inches into the back wall of the facility. 'We've seen strong arms before,' said ESPN draft analyst Mel Spiral. 'Elway was strong. Favre was strong. Mahomes is strong. This kid is a FEMA application. I watched him throw a screen pass that knocked down a cameraman standing 15 yards away from the receiver.' Armstrong's new team, the Jacksonville Gales, has already made accommodations. Wide receivers have been issued reinforced gloves. The team's insurance policy now includes an 'acts of quarterback' clause. The stadium's concession workers have been trained in severe-weather protocols. 'I'm just blessed with a gift,' Armstrong said humbly while doing his pre-practice stretches, which involved bending a steel pole into a U-shape. 'I just want to go out there, give 110 percent, and not injure any of my receivers.' Three receivers have already filed for hazard pay.