Field Geologist's Boots Declared More Valuable Than His Car After 20 Years of Continuous Service

Field geologist Dr. Thomas Bedrock's twenty-year-old pair of Danner Mountain Light boots have been formally declared by their owner to be 'worth more than my car, my television, and arguably my house,' despite an insurance appraisal valuing them at zero dollars. 'These boots have walked every formation in the Northern Rockies,' Dr. Bedrock said, cradling the footwear with visible affection. 'They've crossed the Absaroka Volcanics, the Belt Supergroup, the Elkhorn Mountain Volcanics. They have been resoled seven times. The leather has been conditioned with more care than most people give their children.' The boots, which Dr. Bedrock purchased in 2006 for $340, have accompanied him on over 3,000 days of fieldwork across twelve states. They have been immersed in rivers, buried in scree, frozen in alpine conditions, and subjected to what Dr. Bedrock describes as 'every geological environment short of active lava.' 'I tried to insure them,' he said. 'The agent said they have no market value. I told her they have geological value. She asked me to leave.' Dr. Bedrock's attachment to the boots has become a source of concern for his colleagues, who note that the footwear has been repaired so extensively that it may no longer contain any original material. 'It's the Ship of Theseus,' said colleague Dr. Sandra Outcrop. 'The soles have been replaced seven times. The laces are new. The insoles are aftermarket. Both heel counters have been rebuilt. At what point are these different boots?' 'They are the same boots,' Dr. Bedrock insisted. 'The soul of the boot is in the leather upper, which is original. Mostly. The left boot has a patch on the toe from when I kicked a basalt outcrop in 2014. But the spirit is intact.' Dr. Bedrock's wife has purchased him three replacement pairs over the years, all of which remain in their boxes. 'He says he's breaking them in,' she reported. 'He's been breaking them in for a decade.'