Volcanic Ash Cloud Delays 400 Flights, One Passenger Demands to Speak to the Volcano's Manager

An eruption of Grimsvotn in Iceland disrupted transatlantic air travel for three days last week, canceling approximately 400 flights and stranding thousands of passengers, one of whom — a business traveler from Connecticut — filed formal complaints with the airline, the airport authority, and the Icelandic Meteorological Office demanding to know 'who is responsible for this volcano and how I can escalate my complaint.' The traveler, identified in the complaint filings as Raymond Entitled, was attempting to fly from London Heathrow to JFK when his flight was canceled due to unsafe ash concentrations in the flight corridor. 'I understand that volcanoes exist,' Entitled wrote in his complaint to Eurocontrol, the European air traffic management organization. 'What I do not understand is why no one has taken steps to prevent this one from disrupting commercial aviation. This is a known volcano. It has erupted before. Why was it allowed to erupt again?' The complaint demanded compensation, a formal apology, and 'a concrete plan to ensure this volcano does not interfere with future travel.' It was addressed to 'The Manager, Grimsvotn Volcano, Iceland' and CC'd to the Prime Minister of Iceland. 'We received the complaint,' confirmed an IMO spokesperson. 'We forwarded it to our volcanology department, who described it as the funniest thing they've read this year. We cannot, however, prevent volcanic eruptions. We can only monitor them. The volcano does not report to us.' The airline offered Entitled a travel voucher and a hotel room, which he described as 'inadequate' and 'not addressing the root cause, which is that a mountain was allowed to explode without accountability.' Entitled has since started an online petition titled 'Volcanic Eruptions: Who Is Accountable?' which has gathered 14 signatures, nine of which are from other stranded passengers and five from volcanologists who signed 'for the entertainment value.'