New Parking Permit System Requires Employees to Justify Owning a Car

The Department of Facilities Services has introduced a redesigned parking permit application process that requires employees to submit a 500-word personal essay on their 'transportation philosophy,' three character references from other vehicle owners, and a notarized statement of intent to park. The new process, which replaces the previous system of filling out a one-page form and paying $45, was developed by the Parking Governance Task Force over an 18-month period during which no parking permits were issued. 'The old system was too simple,' said task force chair Douglas Bollard. 'Anyone could get a parking permit. We had no way of knowing whether applicants were truly committed to parking or were just applying on a whim.' The personal essay, outlined in Appendix C of the 67-page Parking Permit Application Packet, must address 'the applicant's relationship with their vehicle, their vision for responsible parking, and the ways in which a parking space would advance their professional development.' Three references are required: one from a current vehicle owner who can attest to the applicant's 'parking character,' one from a supervisor confirming that the applicant's duties require physical presence at the office, and one from a neighbor or community member who can verify that the applicant does, in fact, own a car. 'I've been driving to work for eleven years,' said senior analyst Maria Commute. 'Now I need someone to write a letter confirming I own the car they've watched me get into every morning. My neighbor agreed but said it was the strangest favor anyone has ever asked of him.' The notarized statement of intent requires applicants to affirm that they 'intend to use the parking space for the purpose of parking a registered motor vehicle and for no other purpose, including but not limited to storage, recreation, habitation, or commerce.' Processing time for the new application is estimated at six to eight weeks. In the interim, employees have been advised to use public transportation or 'explore the personal growth opportunities inherent in walking.' Bollard drives to work. His permit was grandfathered in under the old system.