Suggestion Box Requires 12-Page Formal Proposal to Submit a Suggestion

The Department of Organizational Improvement's employee suggestion box, installed in the lobby in March with the stated goal of 'empowering staff to drive positive change,' has received zero submissions in four months, a result department leadership attributes to employee apathy rather than the 12-page Suggestion Submission Protocol required to use it. The protocol, which accompanies the suggestion box in a wall-mounted acrylic pamphlet holder, requires each suggestion to include a completed Form SB-1 (Suggestion Summary), a cost-benefit analysis using the department's standard CBA template, a risk assessment identifying potential negative consequences of implementing the suggestion, and a 200-word justification section titled 'Why Existing Processes Are Not Already Addressing This.' 'We want to ensure that suggestions are thoughtful and actionable,' said Organizational Improvement Director Cheryl Process. 'A suggestion box without a framework is just a box. Anyone could put anything in there.' The protocol also requires suggestions to be submitted in triplicate, with one copy for the Suggestion Review Board, one for the originating employee's personnel file, and one for the departmental archive. Anonymous suggestions are not accepted, as they 'cannot be attributed for performance review purposes.' 'I had an idea about rearranging the break room to improve traffic flow,' said analyst Peter Suggestion. 'I mentioned it to my colleague, and she told me I'd need to fill out the packet first. I read the packet over lunch. My lunch ended. My suggestion did not survive the cost-benefit analysis.' The Suggestion Review Board, which meets quarterly to evaluate submissions, has met four times since the box was installed. Each meeting has concluded within three minutes due to the absence of suggestions. The board's meeting minutes, which are required to be filed regardless, each read: 'No suggestions received. Board adjourned.' 'The system is working exactly as designed,' Process said. 'We haven't received a single bad suggestion.' She declined to comment on whether they had received a single good one.