Train Delay Announcement Achieves New Record for Most Creative Use of the Phrase 'Momentary Inconvenience'

An Amtrak conductor on the Acela service from Washington, D.C., to Boston set a new record Thursday for the most creative deployment of the phrase 'momentary inconvenience' when he used it to describe a delay that ultimately lasted 4 hours and 37 minutes. The phrase was first deployed at 11:14 a.m. when the train stopped outside Trenton, New Jersey. 'Ladies and gentlemen, we are experiencing a momentary inconvenience due to signal issues ahead,' the conductor announced. 'We expect to be moving shortly.' At 11:47 a.m., with the train still stationary, the conductor provided an update: 'We continue to experience the momentary inconvenience. We appreciate your patience.' At 12:30 p.m., the announcement evolved to: 'The momentary inconvenience is ongoing.' By 1:15 p.m., passengers heard: 'We are well into the momentary inconvenience now, and I want to assure you that it remains, in the larger context of human experience, momentary.' The philosophical turn drew attention from passengers, several of whom began recording the announcements. 'He's right, technically,' said passenger and philosophy professor Dr. Elena Trestle. 'In the context of geological time, 4 hours is indeed momentary. In the context of my 2 p.m. meeting in Boston, it is an eternity.' The conductor's finest moment came at 3:22 p.m., when the train finally resumed movement. 'Ladies and gentlemen, the momentary inconvenience has concluded,' he announced. 'As I said, it was momentary. It just happened to be a longer moment than some of us are accustomed to. All moments are created equal, but some are more equal than others.' Passengers applauded. The conductor was later identified as 23-year Amtrak veteran Russell Deadhead, who has been nominated for the National Railroad Historical Society's 'Outstanding Understatement in Public Address' award.