Cartographer Finds New Island, Immediately Regrets Naming Rights Going to Crowdfunding Donors

Marine cartographer Dr. Elena Sextant has expressed 'profound and abiding regret' after an uncharted coral atoll she discovered in the South Pacific was officially registered with the International Hydrographic Organization under the name 'Boaty McIslandface,' per the terms of the Kickstarter campaign that funded her expedition. 'The $50 reward tier included naming rights to any new geographical features discovered,' Dr. Sextant told the Journal of Oceanographic Cartography. 'I assumed we would find some seamounts, maybe a shoal. I did not anticipate discovering a 2.3-square-kilometer island that would appear on every map printed from now until the end of civilization.' The name was selected by a vote among the expedition's 412 Kickstarter backers. 'Boaty McIslandface' received 298 votes, defeating second-place contender 'Isle of Dave' (67 votes) and third-place 'Harambe Reef' (41 votes). Dr. Sextant's preferred name, 'Meridian Atoll,' received four votes. 'I have dedicated my career to rigorous cartographic science,' Dr. Sextant said. 'I will now spend the remainder of that career explaining to colleagues why there is a feature on my charts called Boaty McIslandface.' The International Hydrographic Organization confirmed the registration with what sources described as 'visible reluctance.' A spokesperson noted that while the name 'does not violate any formal naming conventions, it does violate the spirit of approximately all of them.' Dr. Sextant's next expedition will be self-funded. 'No more Kickstarter,' she said. 'The ocean deserves better than this.'