Aperture first, sky later
After three weeks of forecast modeling across eleven spreadsheet tabs, Portland man's proprietary go/no-go algorithm scores Tuesday's window at 6.8 out of 10, clearing his self-imposed threshold by negative two-tenths of a point.
NASA has confirmed the long-held suspicion—and Aunt Mildred's insistence—that the Moon is, in fact, made of artisanal green cheese, prompting a scramble for 'Lunar Palate' specialists and a booming black market.
An eccentric astrophysicist's symphony 'for' the Crab Nebula left audiences and interstellar harmonics experts equally bewildered, but hasn't dampened his artistic ambitions.
A retired taxidermist in Iowa is facing financial ruin after taking investment advice from the Orion constellation, resulting in a portfolio filled with Beanie Babies and porcelain dolls.
NASA's new 'Emotional Support Planet' program, funded by a questionable source, is pairing lonely humans with distant planets—with predictably bizarre results.
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